Wednesday 4 May 2011

Day 4 - My mood is in sync with the weather

Wow, Day 4. I awoke at 3:21am - wide awake! What the? Couldn't settle, was quite restless, my pillows looked like they had been through the wringer and back again... read my book for an hour or so then fell back to sleep. Awoke mid-morning - that familiar nagging feeling from my body, telling me I need a cigarette and my brain telling it "it's not an option".  So far so good.

I headed out to Leongatha today. Spent some time looking around the stores and checking out the cafes. A gorgeous little cafe called Lulu, delicious coffee in fact. 

I had a win, I sat outside and the barista asked me "do you need an ashtray?" to which I replied "I don't smoke"!!!!! 

I DON'T SMOKE! I DON'T SMOKE! I DON'T SMOKE! I DON'T SMOKE! I DON'T SMOKE!

The weather actually mimicked my mood today, it was like I was in sync with it. Pockets of blue sky, and then huge dark rain clouds threatening, I stopped twice to take photos but didn't manage to get one particular beautiful piece of sky that had a black patch with a blue circle in the middle surrounded by white fluffy clouds, almost like a portal to something beautiful. 

My mood in Sync with the weather
Driving through the rolling hills is soothing, but I am still madly chewing gum and drinking water. Aghghghghg the cravings are driving me crazy... Time to head back to the safety of my little villa...

Aaaah my own little piece of silence....

Open the doors and close them gently, step into the serenity...
I've still got a raspy voice, I lost it on Saturday before I left and it's just starting to come back now. I can feel that my body is feeling better, but the cravings just keep going. I oscilate between happy and grumpy and agitated, I just know that if I wasn't here I would have given in by now.  This is HARD.  It's really hard.

I am finding it hard to relax - can you tell? I wanted to read, relaxingly. I wanted to watch movies, relaxingly. I wanted to play Wii (I've got Just Dance 2 and I haven't tried it yet!) and I haven't.  Only 3 more sleeps til it's back to reality. TOMORROW.  One more sleep then I will get to the relaxing stage.  This is hard. I can do it.

I've done it!!!  Love your shape! Jx



4 comments:

  1. Well done, Janine!! You are an inspiration for many, including myself, and in so many ways!! You've supported so many of us with your generosity and your dedication to empowering women to be their best. It's our turn to get behind you and cheer you on!! Hip, hip, hooray for you Janine!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!!! xxxxxxxxxxx

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  2. wow, this is something I need to do. You know you will inspire people by doing this & I wish you all the success. Are you using patches or anything or cold turkey? xx

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  3. Lovely to see you today and have a chat. I think you are an inspiration to all the people out there wanting to give up smoking. It will get easier each day so keep strong, optimistic and we wish you well. J and H
    You looked pretty good to me today - very R-E-L-A-X-E-D - Enjoy the last days of your beautiful Villa!

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  4. Well done Janine, step one accomplished though the journey is not yet over!!! Thanks for choosing Zenergie for the moment!! I am actually surprised by the number of our guests that still smoke....a reminder of how powerful the hold is!!
    Anyway, I'm sure the pure air and the tranquil ambience of My Mantra helped you in your challenge....getting the foundations in order is the start of any new project!!
    Best wishes
    Hess
    Zenergie

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